quoted from the better man "Tammy is already a victim for a vicious attack. Her time is in a total mess and she has to live a life of a refugee. I will say that her plight is worse that the victims of the 911 attack, 2004 tsunami, Bali bombings and the latest phillipine landslide. Has anyone spared a thought for this poor girl? Many of you can argue that she shouldn't had let her boyfriend film their sexual escapades. Some of you can also argue that a 17 year old polytechnic student should not even be having sex in the first place. The rest can even argue that she should be punished and expelled!? Let us get the facts straight, why is all the attention on poor tammy and not her boyfriend? We can only guess. People all around the world have sex, so what's the big deal? Why should a victim get further abused? It's like sentencing a victim of a robbery to jail because he/she was robbed. Does this even make sense?"

i'd disagree with the part about her having a plight worse than the disaster victims, but other than tat, yeah.. i'd say i agree more or less with the better man. but first let me digress.. lemme point ur attn to teh sentence "..why is all the attention on poor tammy and not her boyfriend?" ya, tammy AND her bf are in this together, but how come only tammy's name get mentioned? watever blame/ridicule/pity tat tammy gets, her bf shld get it too. in fact, its not juz their incident. whenever somethign scandalous happens between a gal and a guy and especially it it involves the word which begins with s, ends with x and has e in the middle, its always the female name tat is on the tip of everyone's tongue. juz look at that FEMALE taiwanese polician..wats her name i forgot (good for her). i feel unjust for my half of the world population. its true, there will never be equality between the sexes. while i'd say inequality between teh sexes are sometimes sensible and justified (for after all women and men have different emotional and physical makeup, and are capable at different things), in the case of fingerpointing, inequality is, and shld always be, totally uncalled for.

ok gg back to the topic on hand, i'd say that tammy AND her bf are really very poor things now. it is definitely wrong to "[sentence] a victim of a robbery to jail because he/she was robbed." altho it is true that they were silly enough to commit the mistake of recording their sexploits on film, they do not deserve to be ridiculed and shamed by the public juz becuz of tat silly mistake.(i am not condoning pre-marital sex, that is another issue which i can blog one whole paragraph on) and if i were them, i wldnt noe wat to do except to take a year off school, at the very minimum. guess i'll change my name too. and mebbe wear shades, change my hair colour and never wear it up when i go out to public, and tats only when i cant stand being cooped up at home anymore.

actually, its not really juz the stares/condemnation/ridicule from the public that plague the couple. it is also, if not more so, the fear and shame felt within themselves. becuz, even if their disguise is successful and no one recognises them, its inevitable that they'll keep having tots of otherwise. the fears itself, of recognisation and even hearing their names from lips of strangers are bad enough, nevermind whether the public ACTUALLY recognises them or talk about them. even when everybody has forgotten about them, it doesnt mean that they (ie tammy AND bf) themselves will have forgotten about this issue.. i guess teh emotional scar will take a long time to heal.. i wish them all the best in this aspect.

but well altho i really feel for them, at the same time really, i feel they should have been smarter than to take a video of their sexploits and not only that, but also to keep it on their handphone, sthg tat is so easily lost, if not stolen. cuz really, watever you record, no matter how much you want it to be hidden, no matter wat measures you take to keep it concealed, there's always a chance that it will be exposed someday. and never underestimate that possibility, especially if its sthg you really do not want to show anyone. as i have said to a fren before, the only things tat we can conceal (and only from men, not God) are the things that were never out in the daylight in teh first place.

in a nutshell, i'd say the TWO of them deserve our sympathies (and i hope that their loved ones can rally round them and support them), and i guess the only critical thing i can say about them is tat in teh first place they shouldnt have done such silly things tat cld have (and eventually did) hurt themselves.


ehhh wanted to juz spend 5 min to write a short comment about the better man's entry but in the end wasted 1plus hour.. =| not like i'm so free.. i've been wondering how i can survive my 6 deadlines over the next 2 weeks. heh.