music of the moment: nil

hmm? i htink the counter in blogger really has probs. the last post was counted as teh 100th. if tats the case, sad to say its kinda a sad entry. heh

to relax, or to keep gg? how does the journey continue? i really have no idea. *lost and confused*

i chalked up $87 in handphone bills. how did i ever manage to do tat??? should i change my mobile subscriber??

how can so many other pp manage so many events in their lives? by being unemotional?? by not letting guilt control them?

feel rather bad today for flying someone's kite. was supposed to collect sthg bulky from her today, then end up forgetting about it. then so in the end she had to bring it out only to bring it back again. heh.. only after 5 hours later, when i was in some other place, did i rem........ heez

not being at this extreme doesn't mean you're at the other extreme. you could be at somewhere else, and tat place may not even be between the 2 extremes. Open up your eyes! the world is more than juz one dimensional. (sounds cheem eh)

music of the moment: nil

sobzzz!! its tiring.....really very tiring..

have a lot of tots lately.. but since they're all jumbled up, and yue xiang yue shang xin......... so i tell myself might as well i dun think bout them.. have been qte successful cuz have been busy with stuff.. but sometimes i juz inadvertently start drifting off..

it seems like only one person (excluding Him) in teh world roughly noes wat i'm feelign now.. kinda saddening actually.

music of the moment: nil

hmm i think there's sthg wrong w blogger......now it seems like this is the 100th post i'm writing?? when 2 posts ago it was supposed to be the 95th post?? hmmz. oh well.

ok congrats to me then cuz yeah i definitely feel (at least slightly) better now... :D

but one thing bad is tat i lost my contact lense! again!! i rem i posted not long ago tat i remade one, and tat cost me $150.. well if i go remake it again, it'll cost me another $150!!!! how?? arrgh dun wanna spend this much again so soon.........

hmm sch reopening in a few days time.. but i havent caught up with my work yet! hope i can manage to catch up at least a bit by sunday.. heh

rainne juz recommended me this site for beauty products and tips:

flowerpod

music of the moment: nil

test

music of the moment: nil

ok this is the 95th post i'm gonna write..hmm i wonder wat i'll be writing on my 100th post?? well i hope its gonna be sthg cheery.. if not to have an improvement in teh general mood of my journals then to have a bit of celebration for me reaching the 100th mark. heh

ya i notice tat my entries have been pretty sad lately. like i keep talking about negative stuff.. its getting demoralising. told hyperscorpic to focus on the +ve instead of teh -ve things in life, guess it'd be nice if i can practice wat i preach?? but as i said to him also.. its really qte difficult..

i'm really feeling qte depressed now. esp when i think about tat thing. not as if efforts wasn't put in at all.. juz tat its gonna be a long long time before things can get significantly better. and even then i'm wondering if it will ever get back to wat it was last time, for a short while. meanwhile there's no choice but to juz hold on.. and keep working at it.

i guess its a vicious cycle... my mood affects my life, and consequently my life affects my mood... they feed each other. so how?? nothing else but to break the cycle by improving my mood i suppose.. so ya loh as i said.. its to focus on the +VE!!

ok mebbe i shld start with this one.. the raspberry yoghurt i ate was yummy!! bought it at giant supermarket at imm.. guess its partly due to my long-time biase for raspberry.. heh.. in fact my fav pokka tea is - no prizes for guessing - raspberry tea. heh

and met up with this group of frens.. htink they're really nice.. cuz i dun really noe them but they seem so welcoming.. like i havent met them in qte a while, and they were qte eager to see how i have been.. yepz love begets love.. (btw tats how women work.. if they want sthg, they'll give it first. but of cuz it does'nt include bad things.. heh.)

k its kinda late.. think i gtg zzzz. nitez folks.. may all your tmrs always be better days..

music of the moment: nil

juz went through this horrible thermo quiz. horrible in part cuz i din study for most of it. heh.
am i repentant? not really. heh. it juz happens tat before i cld start catching up on this subj the test is here ald. cuz well the thing is, its not as if i din wanna study for it. i was attending the lecs faithfully until i decided tat even tho i did i wasn't absorbing even 20% of the lec. cuz well its partly cuz my foundation in thermo was almost non-existent in teh first place....and also cuz all those Qs and Ws and Ss and how they're related juz confuses me... *juz thinking bout it gives me the creeps*

irritating thermo.

anw yay the recess is finally here. finally i can have a legal break, however short it may be. heh. = to myself: jia you!

music of the moment: nil

arrgh this is so embarrassing.. i juz got shushed at a lib!! not by a librarian, but by a fellow lib somemore.. shows tat i was really loud and disturbing??

but teh worse thing was i was trying to get my pa to send me some stuff over teh internet via email, so i was telling him my username and password over the phone. so its like, everyone cld hear me reveal my username and password, and its so loud and clear tat its so disturbing??

i feel so stupid now.. like now everyone noes wat my password was?? and more embarrassing was teh fact tat my password was sthg really cheesy.. *blush* but i really had no choice cuz i really wanted the doc sent to be now, and the only computor literate person in my home's away flying to nz. so had to get my comp illiterate pa to do the job instead. double sighz.

k mebbe i shld get away from the lib before pp start to rem who i am liao.. then next time when they see me ard in sch they'd rem "oh she's the one whose password is so cheesy"--goodness!!

anw ya be assured tat the first thing i did after putting down the phone was to change my password. but its still cheesy.. heh..

sigh and to think my horoscope for today says "intelligence is a powerful aphrodisiac, especially for quiet, domestic types." sighz i feel demoralized again. :(

music of the moment: nil

i juz hate it when things go wrong. i juz hate it when (good) things change. i juz hate it when things dun go according to my expectations. i juz hate it when things dun progress. i juz hate it when i've to pretend nothing's wrong when there IS something wrong.

sorry folks juz let me vent my frustrations k. whoever stops me is crazy and cruel.






i think one reason y i'm so frustrated is cuz i feel guilty about feelign all these, like hello? i'm supposed to be pro-active and positive?? and like i reap wat i sow? but dunno leh if i put in effort and no one else does i'd lose qte a bit of interest also. and like when im' in panic mode i freeze.. so everything becomes worse.

haha i dun think anyone is gg to understand today's entry.. cuz its all messed up.. like how i'm feeling now. heh. oooooooooh its cold.

music of the moment: nil

feel so stressed now. juz met a deadline, and right after tat i've got to take care of another one. and its not juz tat. i actually have 3 more deadlines to meet. not to mention cuz of those stooooooopid deadlines i've totally neglected my lecs and tuts. in fact, i'm juz bout to confess something.. something which i havent told anyone. tat is, today's teh 4th day tat i've not been attending lecs and tuts!!!! feel so lousy. sobz!!!!!!!11

but! before you condemn me, hear me out! on friday i din go sch. cuz of some reasons kinda difficult to explain here, on sat i had to go to this seminar which i paid for long long ago before the term even started (paid alot too!), on mon and tues was busy with ia selection and registration so missed teh mornign lecs.. but i still attended teh labs la.

i have 3 stoopid deadlines in front of me but im' juz nt progressing. cuz well i dun really noe how to do them. mebbe i shld anyhow do, complete it then i wont be so stressed liao.

y is teh world such a stressful place.....................hmm mebbe i shld follow this.. to quote from weifeng,
"Lighten up and slide on over
Taking it easy is serious business"

and yeah i'm trying to.............

sighz

music of the moment: nil

$4 for 1 bun and 6pc of fish mcdippers. hmm tats how much i spent and ate for my lunch and dinner altogether today.. and its really not worth it.

*feeling hungry*

sent a fren off at the airport today. had lessons till 1230, went all the way to the airport, reached at 2, hung ard till 430, went back to sch, reached at 630 to have makeup lec until 8pm. hmm tats 3.5 hrs of travelling time for 2.5 hours of hanging ard at the airport.

i have effectively about 2 days to do a lab report which i normally take bout 1 week to do.

and 2 hours more to study for a test held tmr.

and 1 hour to do research for project

and 6 more hours to slp for tonight if i go slp now.

a fren asked me how i was. i guess today's entry about sums it up?